Te Amor

It’s overused. It’s a cliché. It’s corny. It’s just a line. It’s illogical. It’s troublesome. It’s always too abrupt. It’s never on cue. It’s difficult to say. It will be held against you. It’s too bold. It’s often quite pathetic. It’s amazing how, after everything, I love you still works :')

Never Say Never

I wanna tell you I still have feelings for you, but it's not that easy when you're miles away and I got the feeling you don't feel the same way after I broke your heart not once, but twice for a loser. But yesterday you typed ily, right after you said goodnight to me. I stared at my phone screen for a few seconds, and rubbed my eyes twice. I can’t believe that you still have feelings for me after what I did to you. I didn’t know what to reply, other than wishing you goodnight too as I don’t love you, however I do like you. I admit, I still have feelings for my ex, which also happens to be your buddy. Forgetting someone who gave me a lot to remember is not the easiest thing to do. So, I hope you’ll give me time and lets us just remain friends till I’m ready to be more. Right now, I miss you so much and I can’t wait for your SPM examination to be done as it has been a long time since I last saw you.

That's all I've got to say for now. I'll blog soon, when I have the mood to do so because right now I'm down with the flu, fever and sore throat.
So later yo. 

Not My Fault

Shit, I sense that I'm falling for him once more. Fuckkk. It has been so long since I last saw you play sports. I used to cheer for you at the side lines. But now all I can do is just cheer for your team to win, even though I know that your team won't win and just hoping you won’t notice. It’s not like I planned on.. falling for you again. It’s not like I want it. I just can’t help it. All you do is break me, but when I see you, it’s like I forget all that. I forget about the heart you’ve shattered so many times and forget all of the pain I went through.. just for the possibility of you holding me again. I miss you. I don’t know
exactly why I do, but I miss you. So much.

Anyhow, my team The Bubbly Ball won the school softball tournament. YAYYY :D And now, I'm so tired. So blog later yo, nitey nite.

Asians don’t get grounded, but we just get a long ass lecture.

I’m a teenager and hate it when my parents compare me to other kids, and don’t even realize that I’m different from them. My parents don't even know the real me. They don't know how many tears I've cried. How many nights I spent waiting for a call. How many times I've been hurt by some stupid boy. They don't know that their "little princess" has grown up. Sigh, have you ever been angry or sad, to the point where you just break down at home, in your room? Your parents don't know because you keep the tears to yourself, and you cry silently. Your friends don't know because you talk as if you're fine and dandy behind the computer screen. Well you're not fine and dandy, and you know it. No one really knows how you feel, and they have their own lives to deal with, so you don't bother telling them. You bottle it up, and store it with all of the other problems or troubles, forever to be kept deep within.

Already Gone

I’m not the type of girl to wait by the phone. I won’t cry anymore. I now know that it won’t get me anywhere. I've discovered that fact the hard way. So, I’ll laugh - a lot and very often. And I’ll live my own life. And I would really like for you to be a part of it. But I’ll be fine without you,
I promise.

Screw Up

At the end of the day, there are always some things you just can’t help but talk about. Some things we just don’t want to hear, and some things we say cause we can’t be silent any longer. Some things are more than what you say, they’re what you do. Some things you say cause there’s no other choice. Some things you keep to yourself. And not too often, but every now and then, some things simply speak for themselves. Sometimes, all you can do is not think. Not wonder. Not obssess. Not imagine. Just breathe. Breathe in. Breathe out. Everything works out in the end. And the more you worry about it, the longer it’s going to take for things to end perfectly.
Just the way they should.

Just Because

Just because somebody flirts with you, doesn’t mean they like you.

Just because somebody likes you, doesn't mean they wanna go out with you. Just because they wanna go out with you, doesn’t mean they love you. Just because somebody loves you, doesn’t mean they won’t hurt you. Because people lie, things change. boyfriends cheat, and “Best friends” ditch. And there are always gonna be those people who would kill to see you fall.

Sucking Air

Someone asked me yesterday night, What type of guy would you like to date ?. Even though you dumped me months ago, I still describe you when people ask what kind of a guy I like. Its a stupid thing to do, I know. I'm very, very aware of that. I don't really care what people talk behind me, you can say what ever you want because everyone has their own perception on people. I believe in myself, so screw your words about what I did or say as they wont affect me in any way. Oh yeah. I believe in love, in  karma, in kindness, and in singing in and out of tune fashion to your favourite songs. I believe in smiling till your cheeks hurt and laughing till your stomach hurts. I believe in having someone tell you you’re beautiful, dancing in the rain, and miracles too. I also believe in second and third chances, even if you’ve completely screwed it all up.
What do you have to say about that, my friend ? :)

Songs On The Radio

It’s weird, like when you’re in love, all of a sudden you’re hearing all of these love songs for the first time, and it feels like the singer is just talking to you alone, like reading your mind. When you’re grieving, it’s the same thing. It's like I’m in tune with all the sadness of the world suddenly.

Yesterday, I went to Melaka to visit my brother in his University. The journey there was boring, very boring. We did make a few stop at the R&R. And oh, I texted Azizul the whole journey, without him the journey would have been a lot boring-er. On the way back home, my dad played Taylor Swift's songs over and over again as we don't know the Hits fm or Fly fm's frequency in Melaka -.- Yes, I bought the Fearless cd. Every single Taylor's songs remind me of the old memories I had with my ex. So, of course I cried most of the way back home. Luckily I sat behind alone in the car. We arrived home at about 2 in the morning, I think ? But I still can't sleep. Curse you Insomnia. So I text Azizul again, while watching the tv. We praticallly texted the whole night. Till it was 4 in the morning, he excused himself, as he was sleepy. I continued watching tv alone till it was 5 something, then I went up stairs to lay on my bed. I can't remember what time I finally fall asleep. Then, my dad knocked on my door, saying that it is 6 AM already. I was like Nooooo :S So I gathered all my courage and asked my dad if I could skip school today. Thank God he said yes :D And now, here I am, blogging when I should be in school now. Hihi. Hmm, I better go now. My stomach is growling as it wants me to fill it up. Later peps.

Mega Douche

	Ex Boyfriend : Do you have any idea what would happen to you if I die? Ex Girlfriend : I might also die. Ex Boyfriend : *blushes* Why? Ex Girlfriend : Sometimes, too much HAPPINESS can cause death.

Lie Detector

I pretend that I'm over you so my friends will stop yelling at me to move on. I lie to myself and say that it just shows how pathetic you are that you keep asking other girls out after you broke up with me. but the truth is, I'm not okay. I still break down when I think of the life we were supposed to have together, and the memories that were defined as perfect that we created. I still love you. I wish you didn't move on. I'd never admit this to anyone- but even after all the pain you have caused me, I want you back.You said we could still be friends. You were in my life everyday. We talked on the phone for hours every night. Even when we weren't an item. We were friends. Now I spend my time trying to be as busy as possible so I wont miss your goofy texts and voice on the phone late at night. But when I try to fall asleep at night, my head still says your name. All of me misses you. And you said we could still be friends.